Ahhhh...mama is getting old and loving it

So last night Mr. Read and I went to Weezer @ the Roseland and because I'm uppity I made sure to get tickets in the mezzanine because:
A) I'm a wee trick, I can't see shit on the floor
B) Roseland has the WORST sound of any venue in the city but it sounds a touch better higher up
C) I can be a fucking snob when allowed...and when allowed I don't want to roll with the riff raff. Especially when I'm bound to get knocked the fuck into and I got gear on me. Ya heard?

That being said. Man, the mezz rules.

Last week we went to see Mars Volta from that vantage point and it was awesome, as expected. I mean, I could have been in a pigpen and I would have been stoked because I think the MV are the future...as simple as that. The show was self-indulgent and so long but they took it to 13 and were in it to win it so I was stoked...and I had two cocktails so I was cool. My point is this...would have been fine on the floor but the mezz was just right.

In the case of yesterday there is was no way I would have rocked the floor because it seemed like everyone at the show last night was like 12 or 24...whatever. Same thing to me. See I have realized that as I get older I really do need and want to be comfy at shows and when you involve a throng of youngsters the comfort level is just not going to be there...and that makes me sad. See and when that happens I need to remove myself from the masses. Some call it elistism, I call, ificanfuckingdoitiwillism. Let me continue...

See the show was fun, like really fun. The whole crowd was singing EVERY damn word of EVERY damn song and jumping up and down...I mean it was some Reading Festival shit. They did all the songs, "Say it Ain't So", the new joint, "Beverly Hills", "My Name is Jonas", shit they even started with my jam, "Tired of Sex". Rivers worked it out (as much as he could by barely moving at all during the set) and the kids were feeling it...like a midnight revival. Lord knows I love when the youth are pogoing and feeling the holy spirit...I do, that is not my point. Here it is...

I'm at that point where I like watching the fun and madness from a distance. The thought of being in the middle of a moving, breathing, bouncing crowd makes me itch. Don't get me wrong, I love to rawk like the next bitch but I need my space to do such, and lord help a fool if a bead of someone's sweat* touches me. Like, no you DIDN'T done. Yep, I'm getting old, and it's treating me well.

Back in the day I thought I was really cute. I was going to shows and getting all up in the front willing to get my skull cracked. Shit, did it for Korn a few times, dumb move, did it at the Garden for the Beasties in 94 and proceeded to get a boot in the back and bruise two ribs (what you know about that son?!). Plus a shitload of other times...but I ain't got the time to break it down about how I WAS that bouncing, sweaty mass. Now, I need a snack before the event and easy access to the loo and the bar. I have priorities, and they are now not to lose my hearing and/or get my ass seriously kicked.

I officially knew it was time to get the senior meal at Denny's (Grand Slam!) when Mr. Read and I were leaving the venue and I thought: Lord have mercy, it is all musty and damp down here and did that dude just take a swipe at my ass? Where is the exit? Be careful not to trip on that step? Doesn't that young lady need a sweater on? It's not that warm outside. Jeez. Ohmigod, it's only 10:30pm...we can get a drink in a place that isn't crowded. Yippee! Yep, that is what went though my mind. And then it was all reinforced with the Mr. turned and said, "We got about 10 years on this crowd." Yes, yes, we did. And it's fine I guess. Why?

Because we were in the mezzanine in sharp blazers, cute shoes that were NOT going to be scuffed and a hop, skip and a jump away from bathrooms that were mezzanine tidy. It was nice. Good times, good times.

*You can assume when another's sweat is allowed to be thrown into the equation. If don't know what I'm talking about you should not be allowed to be playing reindeer games any longer. Yes, I have no idea what that meant...it just sounded good at the jump.