The Advantages of an Morning Wedding

This Sunday I attended the wedding of my college pal Valerie Grubman. I got four words for you. Ice.cream.sundae.bar. Let me set the scene.

Okay. So, when I got Val's invite I was touched and surprised because we don't roll like we did in college and lord knows that the per head cost is crazy retarded so cutting fools off the list is a must. Anyhoo, my heartfelt appreciation turned to malcontent when I saw that the start time was 11am. On a Sunday. On Long Island. I live in Brooklyn. That is not a subway ride away. Once the mister found a cheap rental car place and I realized I could wear my 3-inch gold heels that I NEVER wear I got over myself. Well kinda...

The mister gets the car and picks me up at 9:30 in the morning and we proceeded to tell each other we looked fresh and then complain about how early it was (shut it, 9:30 on a Sunday is early). We get to the venue (which was beautiful and the drive was also) in like one hour and we're like it would be awesome if their were snacks. Ask and you shall receive. This is when the advantages thing comes in...

We walk in and they are handing out me-mosas and Bloody Mary's. It's not even 11am at this point but it has been brought. Because I'm super mature (and had nothing in me stomach) I headed to the tea and pastry area. I grubbed there and then met up with some old pals (Amanda and Shayna, whut up?!) and their boos (it's so nice when your friends date dudes that know how to spar and are awesomely saucy...or maybe that is all that I care about) and then had another muffin.

Okay next. The ceremony is gully. Even gullier, the cocktail hour that begins at about NOON. Full bar. It's barely lunch time. It's like college all over again. Or my parent's house when I was like 5. But that is another story. And the spread. It was stupid. Corned beef. Beef Wellington. A vodka shot buffet (yes, I didn't make that up). We aren't even at "dinner".

Cocktail hour ends and we head to the reception where we begin eating AGAIN at like 2. Salad, sorbet (cleanse the palate, don't act like you don't know better), main course, wedding cake, dessert tray and the piece de resistance...and Ice Cream Sundae Bar! I wanted to throw up so I could eat more. I mean, there were Reese's Pieces as garnish!

Moral of the story: Apparently I like food and free booze. Morning wedding are kinda cool. Next time I'm bringing Tupperware.