Aspiring models...they know how to bring it

Tonight's "America's Next Top Model" was on FIRE! I can't even wait to write about it tomorrow I just need to relive the magic right here.

It got nastier and cattier than it has before and my ass was bathing in it. Queue the music, "Y'all ready for this?!" Ima have to bulletpoint this shit cause paragraphs will not resonate.

*The trannie, aka Coryn, pretty much calls Lisa an alcoholic bitch and is like I don't like you, shut the eff up, I will cut you from pussy to asshole. Okay, she didn't say the last part but you know how ruff trannies are, I'm sure she was thinking it. That and "Dang, my balls are itching, I wonder how much longer I can tuck my shit and have these bitches not notice."

Cut to...

*Lisa takes this shit to heart drinks herself into a fit, and Bre, being the good bitch she is, goes outside where Lisa is alone talking to a bush, yeah, I said it, and brings her inside. This turns into Lisa drunk dialing her boyfriend and breaking down how alone and sad she feels and she is breaking...and trick breaks. She starts to hyperventilate and it is not cute. See, this is the first time she has felt hated and honeychile, it is not a good feeling. She gets to that hot mess level where you have to be brought a roll of toliet paper to sop up all the tears and snot cause you know that a few sheets of Kleenex ain't gunna cut it. I don't care what all the rest of the girls say I like Lisa...she knows her shit and she takes good pictures. Don't get it twisted! (In loving memory of Ebony)

This leads to...

*For tonight's challenge they have to do three things in a row: A commercial for deodorant, a still for the product and an interview to pimp the product. Well let me tell you this...Lisa bounces back from adversity and KILLS IT. Like shot in the fact with a sawed off killed it. She's cute, sassy and turns it out. Bitches, watch your back...she wants to win and your Heathers like behavior will not work that easily. I'm not happy until their is an attempted murder on the show.

*During the commercial part of the challenge the girls are supposed to add their own line at the end and apparently Nik and Jayla have the same ending...and Nik thinks Jayla heard her rehearsing it and stole the line. Well that is that for Nik...Jayla does hers, pretty well, I might add and then Nik goes out and loses her composure. Lord, that is my girl and my heart fell when she fucked up, but them the breaks. Gurl, you got to rock a lil' Lisa and don't let a little backstabbing get in your way.

*All said and done Jayla gets the cold shoulder from Nik and she is like silly ho, tricks are for kids and now hates her. Just like that, I mean I thought they were cool before, but now she hates her. Well Jayla turns into Sybil and is like, "She's got no personality, I want her off the show, and I will do anything in my power to make it happen!!!!" Or something like that, but let me tell you, I'm not overstating the force of the exclamation points...it was that extra. The crazy bitch was spitting fire. For real, it's them sweet one's you need to watch cause they will choke you out in your sleep. Trust me, I've done it myself.

On to Tyra and the rest of the dream makers...

*The judges LOVED Lisa but when it came down to the judges breaking shit down Nigel was like everything she did was great but I can't stand her. Baby, someone is trying to fill some Janice shoes and I don't know if I like it. See, having a hot/straight man being mean to late teen/early 20 something women is just creepy. Oh, but he's really hot so I'm not that mad.

*Elimination times comes and last two girls standing are Nik and the Coryn...and the other girls are like snap...except for Jayla, they cut to that she-devil and she is practically dancing a jig seeing light skinned Nik up there. Now even though Nik effed it up this week you know the judges couldn't keep the chick with the dick...so ta ta trannie! The girls all gathered around her and did the we are going to miss you hug knowing they are kinda sad she was leaving cause if they weeded out the rest and the dude stayed they could totally win at the end. But alas, got to compete with other Vag...what a bummer!

Moral of the story...I totally sucks if you didn't tonight's episode because I was fixated. This is a real competition people...I love this GAME!